adieu - abortion poetry

Dear Pathetic Poetry,

This is me, your verse cheerleader, your ringmaster apologising for unnecessary morbidity. From when I scribbled you, half a decade ago; when i wept and howled three years ago after i wrote my final segment- i vowed to complete 10 briefs to my unwanted children.I am breaking my vow taken under the influence of a bribe--for more poetry awards, more popularity, more appreciation of young dashing intellect - it's a holly bally humbug and i want to say that to you. i will receive more awards but i don't think i can write this way again. apologies, for i have changed tracks... and i am giving u your final podium forever. i am paying my respects dear muses- stand by me.

To,

All my Unborn Children – 1

iI do not regret your absence.
In fact you wouldn’t have enjoyed the world I live in,
It has nothing much to offer.

My mother accused me once:
“See not what the society gives you,
See what you give to the society.”

I gave them,
My thoughts,
My feelings,
My difference,
My ideology.

I was expatriated,
As an illegitimate child
Of the Hindu society.

My mother blamed it
On the Uranus in my horoscope.

…It’s growing barren
On both sides of the fence.

So, babies feel blessed…
There isn’t much air to breath,
And contamination in the womb is frequent.

There is no space----
To stand,
Sit, or shit.

You grow with confused morals,
You could be in a global village,
With no sense of belonging at all.

You could be born with deformity,
If not physical, psychological or
Worst of all… if you think unalike.

I don’t want the shadow of the cypress
To befall on you.
I would not have preferred a bonsai either.

So I nipped it off in the root.

2

I have been wandering
To seek a different world than I see,
I have failed miserably.

I still hopelessly hope,
Beyond the unknown,
There might be a world,
Unperturbed, untainted, immaculate
By the virus of the subhuman.

I don’t have the courage
To tie you up
With umbilical ropes,
To let you suffer and long to die.

So I take a pill every day.
And see to it that
I bleed every month.

3

I am not sorry,
My dear little one,
I refuse to conceive you.

I am thinking of putting copper-T to use
Abortion is a fairly painful process you know!
And my pain lasts forever,

Accumulated in diaries, letters
And poems like these.

I am sparing you of this pain,
So do not anger.
I can’t be mute,
Therefore I am bitter.

4

I have conceived yet again.
My soul cries out,
My heart is numb
And my mind ignores.

I don’t hear their cries any more.

My children come prepared
To die before they are born.

They are sacrificed at the altar
Of their mother’s Ambition,
Freedom and Foolishness.

They pay a price for the love
That will never die
Because it was never born.

They avenge me through
Vipashana and Therapy.

I stole their life,
They are stealing my mind,

My infidel arse-hole unborns;

---------=+&^#@%*--------------