I feel cold

An Indian state re-elected a murderer. A nation of this world scarily did so years ago.

My fury and disappointment screams happiness for the dolts- "An idiot nation/ state elects an idiot leader- how well deserving."

My mind chews on the whys. my heart, however, feels cold- icy cold and shivers to know that I live amongst people filled with so much parochial love that it makes them hate everything and everyone that is not the same parole, color, religion, territory or history. The saffron will give me jaundice- for extremes have always made me sick. I am sad that the alleys are getting narrower and I may have to walk through them someday-

God, give me the strength to smile, to make friends and to not judge them for the biases they bring.

ps. To be a Hindu, one has to erase hindutva from his/her mind; just as it is vital to walk beyond the rituals, to absorb the essence of the religion you follow.

Bad Day

Waking up was a task, 05:30.. snoozed to 07:30. woke up to curse myself and went back to sleep in the chaos of home's morning schedule. Dad insisted on screwing my mood by singing loudly that Sia's fat maternal aunt should wake up and work! Later took time to coo with her and she puked on me, then laughed, then peed.
All of this amidst my breakfast and NO Chai! Barely browsed through the papers... dismissed them and moved to get over with stuff.
I got an auto real easy today- that got me suspicious--- the end of happiness; this small gesture was going to be avenged! Kay Serra Serra. The trains were late, the college girls were doltishly annoying and while boarding the train my raw silk kurti sleeve caught in the window grill and ttrrrroooore. I seated folded it to deceitful style and turned to face: a dick and a pair of jugs drawn in red- it killed my day. a straight silent line curses and decided I should go home and watch sex and city all day! But then my masochistic, daring self held on. Half way through the journey and the ticket collector checks my quarterly and says “u have expired, yesterday”-- that was it! 330 rs. Fine. I asked her if i could get off and take another ticket- “no, maddum”. Thankfully, I was dressed well or else the women around me would stare at me like they do at lepers and eunuchs.

Got off at Mahim and it was sunny as hell: What did i expect at 11:30am? The only right thing that i did was, wear C.K's one summer! Now at work and have absolutely nothing to do: worse thing to no work is crazy amounts of work.

The pop-up said i received an email form MiL. An old chick friend- married and moved to middle east. Was thrilled to read her opening line “ kaisi hai meri safed kabootri ” only to know that she can't make it to India as decided, coz she had a miscarriage.

Empty Vessel to Fill.

The more i read, the more i watch, the more i browse- I feel saddened by the fact that we were led by a bunch of idiots into the 21st century. However the dark ages are over with a simple realisation that they are idots and will have be replaced.
The work begins.

ps. when you hit ground zero, there only one wayto go- UP